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The Romance Coach

Romance coach in Phoenix, Arizona, image
Photo caption
Paul Xanthopoulos is the director of romance for the Royal Palms Resort and Spa in Phoenix.


With Valentine’s Day approaching, who couldn’t use a little advice in the ways of love? Meet Paul Xanthopoulos, a "personal coach for the romantically challenged." As the official director of romance for the Royal Palms Resort and Spa in Phoenix, he has arranged everything from diamond-studded desserts for private dinners to white doves for impromptu weddings. (800) 672-6011,

Q Can anyone really lay plans for romance?

A The element of surprise is key. When both people plan a romantic evening in advance, it rarely has the same special feeling as when one partner surprises the other.

Q Are women or men more romantic?

A Without a doubt, women are more receptive to intimacy. Men have to put aside a lot of misconceptions about what it means to be sensitive and romantic. Romantic things for men are big, elaborate, and expensive. For women, they’re simple: a moment in time or an evening when the man dedicates himself to her body and soul.

Q A romantic evening you’ve arranged?

A Last night we welcomed a couple who had been married for 37 years. The man had spent the previous week dictating to us all the things he felt the night required: a five-hour dinner, a roaring fire, 100 lighted can-dles around the patio’s perimeter, rose petals covering the floor.

Q Why bring flowers?

A When we offer flowers, we’re making a statement: "My love for you is as delicate as this flower. Treat it with respect." Be proud to walk into a room carrying a bouquet of flowers.

Q Any special tips for men?

A Be sincere. And for crying out loud don’t dress like a bum.

Photography by Laura Segall


This article was first published in January 2007. Some facts may have aged gracelessly. Please call ahead to verify information.